‘Patience is a virtue,’ is an old secular proverb. It is also one of the fruits of the Spirit. And it is hard to come by, and many people don’t have it. In today’s culture, we have an instant gratification culture. Food is more accessible to cook or readily available; entertainment is readily available in various forms, and many places offer overnight shipping, instant bank transfers, and so on. We want it, and we want it now. But with this comes a more readily available sin. Sin and temptation are more readily available now in our ‘instant’ society than it ever has. But if we don’t get what we want when we want it, we can also be led to sin. And this is what Abram and Sarai did.
“For the Scripture says, Everyone who believes on him will not be put to shame” (Romans 10:11). Paul is referencing Isaiah. But he means that God will help you. You will be rewarded for your obedience and trust. There is no need to go your way and try to make it happen. Another secular proverb is, ‘haste makes waste.’ When we overstep, we mess things up. God knows, and He will make it happen at the appointed time. These verses could have been helpful to both Abram and Sarai had they been written back then. “Abram’s wife, Sarai, had not borne any children for him, but she owned an Egyptian slave named Hagar. Sarai said to Abram, “Since the Lord has prevented me from bearing children, go to my slave; perhaps through her I can build a family.” And Abram agreed to what Sarai said. So Abram’s wife, Sarai, took Hagar, her Egyptian slave, and gave her to her husband, Abram, as a wife for him. This happened after Abram had lived in the land of Canaan ten years. He slept with Hagar, and she became pregnant. When she saw that she was pregnant, her mistress became contemptible to her.” (Genesis 16:1-4)
Sarai has long passed childbearing age at this point. She was 75. It is common sense to us that a 75-year-old woman can’t have a baby today; it was also common sense back then. From their perspective, God told Abram he would have a child, but God never said with whom. So they figured he could have a child with Sarai’s slave, Hagar, who was of childbearing age. This was a common practice in those days. If a wife were unable to bear a child, the husband would use one of their slaves as a surrogate. And they thought this was what God meant. Abram would now have a child that was his biological son. Like Abram in the previous chapter, Sarai was not focusing on and trusting God. But that’s not how God planned it; this child was not the promised son. As mentioned previously, Scripture mentions different occurrences of polygamy and adultery; however, it never condones it. God made marriage between one man and one woman, and it is only in marriage that children should be born. And you can see this in these verses. Notice it emphasizes that Sarai is Abram’s wife twice, that Abram is Sarai’s husband once, Hagar is Sarai’s slave once, and Sarai is Hagar’s mistress once. The text is putting each person in their place and making sure the reader knows each person’s place. This is to state that while it was a standard practice back then, it is still wrong in the eyes of God.
Hagar was pregnant, and Sarai was jealous. “Are you so foolish? After beginning by the Spirit, are you now finishing by the flesh?” (Galatians 3:3) Paul asked the Galatians a critical question. If you began your walk with God by the Spirit of God, why would you resort to the flesh to continue on and finish your walk? He puts it another way to the Philippians, “I am sure of this, that he who started a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 1:6). Abram and Sarai could have used these two verses. God started their journey, and they put their faith in Him when they obeyed and moved into the land of Canaan. God promised them a son and innumerable descendants. But instead of trusting in Him, they resorted to their means to make the promise happen. Instead of continuing to wait for the appointed time in the Spirit, they returned to the flesh. Bad things always happen when we make something happen by the flesh. In the immediate sense, Sarai and Hagar started to display some of the works of the flesh. “Then Sarai said to Abram, “You are responsible for my suffering! I put my slave in your arms, and when she saw that she was pregnant, I became contemptible to her. May the Lord judge between me and you.” Abram replied to Sarai, “Here, your slave is in your power; do whatever you want with her.” Then Sarai mistreated her so much that she ran away from her.” (Genesis 16:5-6) In the extended sense, this child and the promised child caused fighting that carries to the present day between those who claim Ishmael is the promised child and those who claim Isaac is the promised child.
Sarai mistreated Hagar, and Hagar ran away. The works of the flesh always cause division. There was a division between husband and wife and between servant and master. Sarai blamed her husband and mistreated her servant. Abram abandoned his position as spiritual authority and gave in to his wife instead of reconciling. Hagar abandoned her home and ran away from her problems. But just as with Adam and Eve, we can’t run and hide from our problems. “The angel of the Lord found her by a spring in the wilderness, the spring on the way to Shur. He said, “Hagar, slave of Sarai, where have you come from and where are you going?” She replied, “I’m running away from my mistress Sarai.” The angel of the Lord said to her, “Go back to your mistress and submit to her authority.” The angel of the Lord said to her, “I will greatly multiply your offspring, and they will be too many to count.” The angel of the Lord said to her, “You have conceived and will have a son. You will name him Ishmael, for the Lord has heard your cry of affliction. This man will be like a wild donkey. His hand will be against everyone, and everyone’s hand will be against him; he will settle near all his relatives.” So she named the Lord who spoke to her: “You are El-roi,” for she said, “In this place, have I actually seen the one who sees me?” That is why the well is called Beer-lahai-roi. It is between Kadesh and Bered. So Hagar gave birth to Abram’s son, and Abram named his son (whom Hagar bore) Ishmael. Abram was eighty-six years old when Hagar bore Ishmael to him.” (Genesis 16:7-16)
This is the first appearance of the Angel of the Lord, who is believed to be Jesus, long before He became human and lived a human life. Think about this. Abram or Sarai did not want Hagar. She was pregnant and alone, having nowhere to go and fend for herself and her soon-to-be child. She was a slave. She was the lowest of the low. And God had mercy on her. He cared for her. Even when others reject us, God still accepts us. He visited her and told her to go back to Sarai and Abram. Notice He says, ‘Hagar, slave of Sarai.’ To indicate He does not accept that she was married to Abram. Abram’s wife is Sarai. He tells her that she will have a son and to name him Ishmael, which means God hears. And He promised her that she would have many descendants, just like He promised Abram. Ishmael is the father of the Arab nations. Hagar named God El-Roi, which means the God who sees. God saw Hagar, and He heard her. He cared, just as He cares for each of us. She learned that He is a personal God and that a personal relationship with Him is meaningful. Hagar, by faith, went back to Sarai and Abram. She submitted to God, then to Sarai.
Many things Paul wrote in Romans can be displayed here and in other areas of Abraham’s life. “But whoever doubts stands condemned if he eats, because his eating is not from faith, and everything that is not from faith is sin.” (Romans 14:23). Specifically, the last part, everything that is not from faith, is sin. Instead of waiting in faith for the appointed time that they would have a child, Abram and Sarai went their way, not in faith, and ended up with problems that are still reverberating. “If by the one man’s trespass, death reigned through that one man, how much more will those who receive the overflow of grace and the gift of righteousness reign in life through the one man, Jesus Christ.” (Romans 5:17) Abram was reigning in life to God’s glory by faith. But when doubt set in, sin reigned, and its consequences were in full swing. We must yield to Christ and plant our stake in Him. He is the only firm foundation. “The law came along to multiply the trespass. But where sin multiplied, grace multiplied even more.” (Romans 5:20). Sin multiplies fast. Sarai and Abram allow adultery; she then gets jealous of Hagar and mistreats her. Abram becomes indifferent, and Hagar runs away. But grace abounds even more. God came to Hagar and promised her a healthy child and many descendants. Abram had a son and loved him after being childless his whole life.
Grace abounding more over sin doesn’t mean that God approves of sin. Instead, it shows that God can and will accomplish His good and perfect will, even when people are at their worst and doing horrible things. God knows everything, and so He knows when we will disobey and when we will repent. He knows how to accomplish His purpose even through our disobedience. But the key is to remember that He is in control and loves us, and to turn back to Him when we turn away.